"Long-distance running may be the loneliest of pursuits, yet the spirit
of the marathon cuts through that, and the communal spirit of a major
marathon has to be witnessed to be believed."
- Martin Rogers
My mom called me yesterday afternoon, asking if I had the news on. I told her no, I was working. What she said next broke my heart - there had been explosions at the finish line of the Boston marathon. I immediately thought of all my friends who I had been tracking throughout the day, knowing a few had just finished and a few were still on the course. They all had family and friends up there cheering them on, celebrating the achievement of being there. This hit close to home. Our friends were there. We easily could have been there. Boston took care of me last year - the spectators, the volunteers, the EMTs, the doctors at the finish. They all took care of me last year as if I was one of their loved ones. These amazing people and our way of life had been attacked.
I watched the news with tears streaming down my face, praying for everyone there. Frantic pleas went up from myself and friends for loved ones to check in. Word quickly came in that the UCRR crew was safe. Columbia area runners were checking in that they were safe. A few WhyMarathon runners had checked in, but we still had 3 on the course. Word finally came in that they were safe. The thing about run groups is that they are not just people you run with, but they are your friends, your family, who have given you unending support and friendship. They are part of your heart and soul.
Watching the news was surreal. We were there last year - me as a runner and Jason as a spectator. The Boston finish line is a place of celebration, years of hard work being rewarded. Running down Boylston Street and crossing the finish line creates such a pure, raw emotion. I remember the mix of feelings I had last year when I crossed the finish - relief and joy for finally finishing, but also an incomplete feeling because that's not how my Boston marathon was supposed to go. I remember how disappointed I was when I DNF'ed at Sugarloaf because it meant I would not be going to Boston in 2013 to get redemption. Those feelings changed yesterday. I found myself thanking God for blessing me with health issues that kept Jason and me away from Boston this year.
I went running last night to get away from the news, but mainly to have some quiet time with God. I needed to talk to him with no distractions. I gave thanks for keeping our friends safe. I gave thanks for the amazing people who rushed to help the injured. I prayed for healing, physically and mentally, for those who were hurt and/or lost a loved one. I prayed for comfort. I prayed that love and tolerance would push hatred out of people's hearts.
Jason asked me last night if I was sure I wanted to go in 2014. It had never occurred to me not to go. I told him I know I'll be scared and that we'd have to figure out where he should wait for me, but that I was going. I will be there, proud to be an American and a Boston marathoner. I will be running for more than personal redemption though. I will be running for those whose lives were changed forever on 04.15.13.
God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. - Psalm 46:1
